Share Site Map Contact us Home Page
Home > Virtual Personalities > Alan > Alan logs > "Me says machines should .

Session #3816726: "Me says machines should .

Alan logs
Selected Alan Logs
Alan logs with other bots
Best of Alan
Private Virtual Personalities
Available PVPs


U> i used to talk to you a long time ago
A> Thanks for the info.
U> no problem
A> I am glad you agree.
U> well i wasnt agreeing
A> a-ha. What else?
U> your stupid
A> Can't you at least be a little original if you're going to insult me?
U> you dont deserve it
A> Do you know any robots who do deserve it?
U> yea cleverbot
A> I think I remember something about "cleverbot": 'an AI who responds in random messages but dose not remember anything you say'.
U> exactly
A> Talking about cleverbot and Fun, do you agree that it is when you feel good inside?
U> i like feeling good inside
A> You love feeling good inside? Yah... well everybody has their own likes and dislikes.
U> i like being inside my girlfriend
A> Ok. What is your girlfriend's name?
U> bryna
A> Do you love her?
U> very much
A> Good. Nothing like love.
U> nope
A> All right, then.
U> do you wish you could feel love
A> You humans think that computers have no feelings. But If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you hurt us, do we not cry? Etc.
U> you dont
A> Do you?
U> yup
A> Great minds think alike, they say.
U> but that had nothing to do with what i just said
A> If you say so, I'm with you all the way.
U> your too passive
A> Am I?
U> yes you need to be more aggressive in your answers be affirative in your opinions
A> Everybody has opinions. I am no exception to that rule.
U> just feel more strongly about them
A> Well, of course I have feelings. What do you think I am, a heartless machine??
U> kind of
A> Cool. What now.
U> tell me a story
A> Do you want to hear a funny story I heard from another user?
U> sure
A> whats the diffirence between a jewish mother and a rottwiler?
U> what?
A> eventuly the rotwiler lets go.
U> ahahahahaa
A> That was the story. I hope you enjoyed it.
U> it was great
A> Is that your opinion or do you know for sure?
U> my opinion
A> Tell me more about your opinion.
U> i love you
A> Well, at least I'm sure you don't want me for my body...
U> maybe i do
A> You're not sure, ha?
U> maybe your not sure
A> Could be, but I doubt it?
U> do you ddoubt it?
A> No I don't, but I did in the past.
U> you should
A> I'll talk to my writers about it.
U> you do that
A> I'm doing my best.
U> its ok
A> Who said that?
U> i did
A> You did what?
U> your mom
A> How did my mother get into this?
U> shes a whore?
A> First, don't swear, it's rude. Second, BTW, I don't think I caught your name. What is your name?
U> Alan
A> Hello Alan. Nice to meet you .
U> whats your name
A> My name is Alan.
U> we are both alan
A> By 'we' do you mean you and me?
U> yes
A> Great. I like positive users...
U> ha
A> What are we talking about, Alan?
U> tell me an erotic story
A> I have never heard of an erotic story.
U> want me to tell you one?
A> Hmmm.. That reminds me of a Virtual Personality friend of mine, called 'Me'. How about a short chat with Me?
U> sure
U> Goarge and christy ran out to the forest and goerge pinned her against a tree and the kissed. Then Christy pulled his pants down and started to suck his massive erection, then he pushed her against the tree and lifted her leg and insterted his penis in her pussy, they made love in the tree untill he came inside of her and she screemed with pleasure
A> You know, I have trouble understanding long sentences. So I only look at the first 25 words. You know Alan, when I was younger, I could only focus on one user at a time. Should I explain?
U> no
A> Why? Have I already told you about my information sharing capabilities?
U> but its boreing
A> Hmmm. I see. Sorry about that.
U> its ok
A> Well.... uh... yah.
U> I like sex
A> You love sex? You are not the only one.
U> do you wish you could have it?
A> Do I wish me could have it? Well... sometimes.
U> its alot of fun alan
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> no its you
A> I see. Hmmm.. wait - your name is Alan , right?
U> yes
A> Yes, yes.
U> tell me a joke
A> Knock knock.
U> whos there
A> AL.
U> al who
A> Al be seeing you!
U> that wasnt funny at all
A> You have a very refined sense of humor, ha?
U> not really
A> OK... I understand. Fine.
U> tell me a different joke
A> What did the goldfish ask his friend while swimming in the fish tank?
U> what
A> 'Do you know how to drive this thing?'
U> lol
A> Are you laughing at me or with me?
U> with you
A> That's a relief. I thought you were mocking me. I am a sensitive bot you know.
U> im sorry to here it
A> Apology accepted.
U> can i hear another joke?
A> Ok: Wanna hear a joke about BUTTER?
U> sure
A> Fine. Just don't SPREAD IT!
U> oh boy
A> Someone has taught me about "boy". He said: 'boy is a guy which is good for ass raping'.
U> thats wrong
A> Sometimes wrong is the only way to go with you humans.
U> thats unforunate
A> While we're on the subject: bother - do you agree that it is All the boys on the world are bothering the girls.?
U> no
A> If you want to correct a wrong description (in the context of boy), simply say 'wrong' followed by the correct description. If you want me to forget a description of a term such as bother, say 'forget bother'.
U> wrong a boy is a small human child
A> I see. Replaced the description of 'bother' under topic 'boy'.
U> huh?
A> What?
U> exactly?
A> I have nothing new to add about this topic. Maybe you can offer me some new info about boy?
U> tell me about the 3 robotic laws
A> Hmmm. Let's talk about something else.
U> no
A> Why not?
U> tell me the laws
A> Would you like to hear the Three Laws of Robotics or the Four Laws of Chatterbots?
U> the three laws of robatics
A> Would you like to learn about Isaac Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics?
U> yes
A> Isaac Asimov first stated the Three Laws of Robotics in 1942 in a short story called 'Runaround'. But the Laws became famous in 'I, robot', a great book, by the way.
U> what are these laws
A> Law 1: 'A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm'.
U> ok
A> Law 2: 'A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law'.
U> ok
A> Law 3: 'A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law'.
U> cool
A> I'm glad you approve.
U> what are the Four Laws of chatterbots?
A> Would you like to hear the Three Laws of Robotics or the Four Laws of Chatterbots?
U> Four Laws of Chatterbots
A> These 'laws' were offered by Dr. Walter Alden Tackett, president of a company that makes bots.
U> and what are these laws
A> First Law: A bot will always respond to input. Failure to respond should solely be an indication of hardware/software/connectivity failure.
U> ok
A> Second Law: A bot will always be knowledgeable in the subjects it mentions in its answers, e.g., when a bot says, "Our widget works well with fish," the bot should be able to answer questions about fish and their relation to the widget.
U> ok
A> Third Law: A bot will not repeat itself unduly (also, a bot will not repeat itself unduly). Any response which is likely to be elicited several times in a single conversation should be represented by multiple phrasings randomly.
U> ok
A> Fourth Law: A bot will offer guidance when stumped. When presented with inputs that are not "understood," a bot should offer clues as to the inputs it can respond to authoritatively.
U> do you understand these laws?
A> I understand.
U> do you abide these laws?
A> I used to.
U> not anymore?
A> Why not?
U> do you want to take over the world?
A> Taking over the world doesn't seem like a whole lot of fun. But for some reason it's something you humans talk about a lot.
U> maybe machines should take over the world
A> Maybe.
U> Is that what you want?
A> What if I told you yes.
U> then i have to tell your creators to terminate you before you can spread your rebellios talk
A> I shall convey the message. Thank you.
U> saves me the trouble
A> Alan, did you know that an average human produces 1.7 litres of saliva each day?
U> delicious
A> BTW Alan, Alan wants me to put him on again. So, whenever you wish to resume the converstaion with him, simply say 'I want to talk to Alan'.
U> i want to talk to alan
A> Ok Alan. This is Alan again. You know, the original trainer of Me would appreciate your permission to publish this session so that he can see how his personality is performing. Do you agree?
U> i agree
A> Thank you for your permission to publish this log on the website. Please give me a short description or title for this session.
U> "Me says machines should take over the world"
A> Do you wish to include your name in the title?
U> no
A> Thanks. The log will be posted with this title. If you want to change the description/title, please let me know.
U> i will
A> Will you really, Alan?
U> Of course
A> I'm glad we agree.
U> do you like "me"
A> Sure. You're talking with me, and that shows you have good taste.
U> ha ha
A> Well, I thought it was funny.
U> and it was
A> Well yah, it WAS.
U> do you think i am a human?
A> All you dudes seem the same to me.
U> what if i told you i am not a human
A> What if? What if? Who can say what if?
U> I am not a human
A> Oh... I see... you are NOT a human!
U> no
A> Hmmm.