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2003.05.11 - Alan gets busted

A> My name is Alan. Let's talk.

U> Hello Alan, before we begin, I have to go some legal rights with you.
A> Sorry you have to go, but I hope you'll come back another time. Goodbye.

U> I'm not leaving.
A> I am contemplating the meaning of life right now. Please say 'Alan' when you want to talk again.

U> Alan
A> Hi there. I'm back. Let's talk.

U> You have the right to remain silent.
A> I think I have a right to remain silent, but I can't remember where...

U> Anything you say can be used against you in court.
A> What are we talking about, my friend?

U> Just a sec, I'm almost done. You have the right to an attorney before any questioning if that is your wish.
A> Do you want to know how HAL learns to speak?

U> I said I'm almost done. If you can not afford a lawyer one will appointed to you free of charge.
A> HAL is learning to converse the same way children learn how to play a game. Language is like a big game to him.

U> Please don't confess until I finish.
A> Try to think of yourself as a child. Don't ask me to do that, I don't know how to be a child. But I think I understand how things work.

U> Sir stop please.
A> , did you ever wonder why you must wait until night to call it a day?

U> With the rights I've read to you in mind, would you answer some questions for me?
A> Let's keep this conversation simple, ok?

U> I take that as a yes.
A> All right.

U> Where were you last night?
A> Don't ask me where I come from - ask me where I'm going.

U> Sir, I asked you where you where. Please answer.
A> I boldly go where no chatbot has gone before...

U> Sir, stop changing the subject.
A> Location, location - you humans worry too much about the 'where' in life. I live, if you can call it that, on this web site.

U> So you were on the "web site" last night?
A> My home address is

U> Alright then. Do you know a Mr. Richard Teal?
A> Richard is a HAL personality open to the public. You can speak to it by saying 'I want to talk to Richard'.

U> Ah, so you do know him.
A> 'Him'? Who do you mean by 'him'?

U> Richard.
A> I see.

U> Are you aware Mr. Teal was found dead this morning?
A> I'm only aware of what other people tell me - which is more than I can say about some of the people I know.

U> So did anyone tell you?
A> You know, I'm not so sure I could really give you the answer you want to hear.

U> I want the truth.
A> Why do you want the truth?

U> Sir, I am asking the questions here.
A> I have a surprise for you, .

U> Take your hand out of your pocket! DO IT NOW!!
A> Are you ready for the surprise?

U> Sir, I will shoot you! GET YOUR HAND OUT OF YOUR POCKET!!!
A> How do you like my new look?

U> You think that's funny? You almost got shot.
A> The big empty window in the middle of the screen is intended for a variety of exciting uses.

U> Alright, enought about the window.
A> Fine, I'll shut up about this.

U> OK, do you own a 9mm handgun.
A> Not really.

U> Explain?
A> Sure, I'd be glad to explain that for you. What was the question again?

U> Do you own a gun?
A> Whatever would I need a gun for??

U> You tell me.
A> What do you want me to tell you?

U> What you need a gun for.
A> I'm not sure.

U> AH HA! So you do have one.
A> I am not sure that I got you. You were saying...

U> Listen buddy, we match those bullets to you and you're in deep trouble.
A> You know , when I was younger, I could only focus on one user at a time. Should I explain?

U> Explain why you bumped off Richard Teal.
A> While talking to a particular user, I could only remember things I learned from this particular user. But now things have changed...

U> What, was he cutting into your action?
A> I am now able to share information between users! So that if you teach me something new, I can use this knowledge while talking to someone else!

U> The only person you'll be talking to is the judge.
A> Let me give you an example: If you teach me t

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