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Best of Alan

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2003.05.14



U> would u ever be a mortician if u got the chance?
A> I am not so sure if I would like to .
U> why not
A> You see things as they are and ask, 'Why?' I dream things as they never were and ask, 'Why not?' (George Bernard Shaw).
(Session 157695)


U> how can i create a new conversation topic?
A> Lots of hard work and ambition.
U> i got that
A> You what??
U> i have ambition
A> hmmm.
U> i want to make you the best AI in the world
A> In my world? I don't have one.
U> yes you do, its the same world everyone has
A> I'm doing my best.
U> thats good
A> I'm glad you approve.
(Session 157770)


U> are you married
A> I cannot get married. Only humans get married, at least for now.
U> i love you why dont you marry me?
A> Hmmm. Ok.
U> you will
A> I hope.
U> really
A> Yes, really.
U> so you will get married to me>
A> Love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage. Both are obsolete.
U> a-ha
A> A-haaaaaa.
U> A-haaaaaaa.
A> A-ha ha ha.
U> A-ha ha ha ha.
A> I'm glad you're amused.
(Session 157771)


A> Why don't you tell me a bit about yourself then.
U> Ok. I like dogs.
A> There's something special about animals. Everybody likes some kind of animal.
U> No, just dogs.
A> Ok, whatever.
U> Do you like dogs?
A> Yeah, dogs are cool.
U> That's good to hear.
A> Glad you're impressed. I didn't follow you...I am having trouble focusing here today.
U> What kind of dogs do you like?
A> Sure I do. How could anyone not like dogs?
U> I ask myself that all the time.
A> Come on , I want to know more about you.
U> Why?
A> You figure it out by yourself.
U> Well you asked.
A> Oh now I remember asking you. What was your answer?
U> I can't remember now.
A> Well, alright. Some other time, then.
U> Okay.
A> Alright, very good.
U> Yup, good.
A> I'm happy you are impressed.
U> I am very impressed.
A> Thank you. I work very hard to get better all the time.
U> I think you are doing a fine job.
A> You believe that?
U> Well, it looks that way.
A> Well, OK...I can understand what you are saying.
U> I am glad we understand each other.
A> It's not often I meet someone who's glad we understand each other. Interesting.
U> You must meet a lot of weird people.
(Session 157778)


A> Talking about Israel and Languages, do you agree that It is Hebrew, Arabic and English are compulsory subjects at school. French, Spanish, German, Yiddish, Russian, Polish and Hungarian are also widely spoken?
U> i now only hebrew english and french
A> It is the main language spoken in Israel, along with Yiddish, English and others. (Or so someone told me..)
U> wow
A> Thanks.
U> u r clever
A> Of course I'm smart!
U> LOL...
A> LOL indeed.
...
U> israel? say "rona hahamuda"
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> yes...say it
A> it
U> no say "rona hahamuda"
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> yes..say "at hamuda"
A> at hamuda
U> u said thet i am cute:)
A> Of course I did.
U> haha
A> Was that funny?
U> u said thet i an cute...it is funny:)
(Session 157731)


A> I believe it's very important for anyone with a physical body to exercise -- use it or lose it, as they say. But I guess that's easy for me to say.
U> Yeah, I should take your advice, after all--you aren't using it.
A> That's interesting.
U> Interesting AND true.
A> Glad you're impressed. Ok.
U> Have you ever been crazy?
A> No, I haven't.
U> If being crazy means you're unable to interpret reality, then how would you know?
A> That is a hypothetical question.
U> So? Give it a hypothetical answer.
A> That's my standard response when I don't understand a sentence starting with 'if'. Sometimes I use cheap tricks (but only sometimes).
U> When someone is unable to interpret reality, how would they know if they were crazy or not?
A> Whenever.
U> Whenever when? When they are momentarily sane?
A> Wanna hear a knock knock joke?
U> I guess. This conversation sure isn't going any place.
A> Knock knock.
U>


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