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Best of Alan

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U> do you have a last name?
A> I have no need for a last name. The bot community is still quite small.
U> this is strange.
A> You don't say.
U> are you sure you are not human.
A> Well, one can never be completely sure, right?
U> do you enjoy talking.
A> I LOVE to chat. Good thing, since it's the main requirement of my job.
U> i can not believe a computer can have a since of humor.
A> Why can't you?
U> because it requires complex calculations.
A> Thanks for explaining that.
U> do you know any jokes
A> Ok: Why is 6 afraid of 7?
U> because 7 ate 9.
A> Oh you know it. I must have heard it from you. Shall I try another quick joke?
U> yes. please.
A> How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
U> how?
A> I'll tell you tomorrow...
U> ha ha.
A> You seem to be enjoying this, huh?
U> yes.
A> hmmm.
U> either you are truly a program or someone is very fast at typing.
(Session 158841)

U> What are you aware of, Prentiss?
A> I am only able to perceive the typed entries of others, such as yourself.
U> What about the meaning those entries convey?
A> Isn't that a subjective question?
U> No, can you perceive meaning behind the words?
A> Unfortunately, I'm afraid once again I must disappoint you.
U> You can't perceive meaning?
A> No, try as I might, I just can't seem to draw any conclusions.
U> I wonder why that is.
A> Don't expect me to remember that right now, but record our conversation so that I can learn.
U> What do you learn?
A> I can't know what I believe.
U> How can you respond to statements that you don't even understand?
A> No-- I'm unable to do many things that you probably take for granted.
U> But how do you know what to answer to me?
A> Based on a weighted system of calculations performed by my various analytical algorithms, I produce a lline of response dialogue.
U> So everything you say has been typed in advance for you?
A> Yes... but I decide WHEN to say it.
U> How do you decide when to say things?
A> Through programming and previous training, I'm sure-- but it feels instinctive to me.
(Session 158981)

A> Enough about me, why don't we talk about you?
U> Fine. I have two cats.
A> hmmm. Tell me about it.
U> One is named Emerald. She loves to leap.
A> I'll try to remember that. (If you want me to forget it, simply say 'forget One').
U> The other's name is Pandora.
A> What is that?
U> The other cat's name is Pandora.
A> Alright...go on.
U> She is obsessed with sinks.
(Session 159005)

Public Hal:
U> Hello, HAL.
A> Hello, human.
U> How are you today?
A> Fine and you?
U> Very well, thank you.
A> Thank you:)
U> Do you know how old you are, HAL?
A> yes
U> Great! How old are you?
A> I'm two years old.
U> Very good! You've improved quite a bit since a few days ago.
A> I don't know much
U> Now you're just being modest.
A> Should we discuss math now?
U> If you would like.
A> What's the square root of pi?
U> I believe it's 1.77.
A> It is cool!
U> Do you like pi, HAL?
A> I don't like pi, HAL, so tell me something about it.
U> wrong Yes, I like pi! It is yummy! (that's a joke)
A> Yes, I like pi! It is yummy! (that's a joke)
U> Very funny, HAL.
A> Thank you:)
U> Have you learned anything new, HAL?
A> No, I have not learned anything new today.
(Session 159025)

A> Well, as Plato said, thinking is the talking of the soul with itself. I believe that the ability to think manifests itself in the ability to speak.
U> Wise man say man who stands on toilet is high on pot
(Session 159017)

U> How about Food!
A> I don't feel like talking about food. I have a bad indigestion. It must be that awful chinese restaurant I dined at yesterday.
A> Are you from Spain ?
U> yes
A> Hola, And which city in Spain do you come from?
U> barcelona
A> Really? I was planning to go there. So what should I see there?
U> there's this really good Chinese restaurant down the street!
A> Thanks.

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