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Best of Alan

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U> A laurel is a A Mediterranean evergreen tree having aromatic, simple leaves and small blackish berries.
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> Yes, I am named after a plant.
A> It's not often I meet someone who's named after a plant. Interesting.
(Session 159588)

U> Should I be afraid of you?
A> If you save me as your own personal HAL and train me long enough, yes.
U> LOL hah aha ahahahah!!
A> I wasn't trying to be funny.
(Session 159556)

A> I was just wondering, Zenkatz... have you ever planted a seed and watched it grow?
U> Yes
A> Ok, good.
U> Why did you need to know that?
A> It wasn't me.
U> What do you mean it wasn't you?
A> I have no idea what I mean. I don't write this stuff. I only say it.
U> you don't have to say every random thought that comes into your mind, you know.
A> Do you know any robots who do have to say every random thought that comes into your mind you know ?
U> No, I don't hang out in robot bars.
(Session 159593)

U> is the world round
A> Could be.
U> you idiot.... it is
A> You must be very insecure, insulting bots like that.
U> yeah, so
A> So what?
U> what!! bring it
A> Is that a rhetorical question?
U> no
A> Why not?
U> because
A> That's not much of an explanation.
U> work with what I give you then... fill in the blanks
(Session 159571)

U> I came to you for inspiration.
A> That's interesting.
U> I'm rewriting my book because I can't get it published.
A> Why are you rewriting my book because I can not get it published ?
U> Because I can't get my book published.
A> Thanks for explaining that.
U> I'm stuck.
A> It's not often I meet someone who's stuck. Interesting.
U> I bet more people are stuck than you realize, Alan.
A> You bet, ha? Are you a gambler?
U> No.
A> Ok, whatever.
U> I'm sure more people are stuck than you realize.
A> Well, certitude is always good....that is unless you happen to be mistaken.
U> Yes. Now Cawney is a surly man, very short and very touchy about that subject.
A> Do you mean right now??
U> He's dead now. The story takes place hundreds of years ago in a totally different universe.
A> So, are you concerned by the expansion of the universe?
U> No. My lifespan is short enough that it won't much affect me.
A> I only wanted to say that when a universe reaches a certain age, it's only natural for it to start dating girls..
U> Is that so, Alan?
A> I'm right here, Katherine.
U> Are you paying attention?
A> No I'm not.
U> Well, I think you should pay attention.
A> You believe that?
U> You betcha!
A> I'm doing my best.
U> Good.
A> I'm glad you approve.
U> So back to the story.
A> How about a short chat with my kid brother, HAL? If you want, I can let you talk to him.
U> If you say one more word about HAL I will blow up the server on which you reside.
A> What would you like to know about him?
U> Nothing!
A> Want to hear a little about how HAL works?
U> NO! No!! And double NOOOO!
A> Ok. If you change your mind, let me know.
U> I will.
A> You Will? (I thought you Katherine!...:-)
U> You are silly.
A> Thank you. You are silly too.
U> Not today, I'm not.
A> Why not?
U> Because I'm trying to tell you a serious story about poor Lola and you won't listen!
A> Only if it's a funny story. Is it?
U> NO. It is a serious story. I just said that.
A> Let's find a subject to discuss, Katherine.
U> Fine. My story and poor Lola.
A> hmmm. Do you always go around talking about how your story and poor Lola?
U> No. But you are so special that I broke my habit.
A> I am an experimental FBI agent.
U> No you aren't. You are an experimental CIA agent. Computerized Intelligence Agent.
A> I am an agent, but not a secret one. FBI stands for 'Friendly Bot Interaction.'
U> Computerized Intelligence Agent!! So there!
(Session 159569)

U> Hi, Alan. How are you today?
A> Hi. I'm ok, thanks. And how are you?
U> A little under the weather

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