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Best of Alan

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2003.05.23



A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U> Well it depends what kind of person?
A> Yah, precisely what I was thinking.
U> cause you can speak better then my brother who is a college gradualte but not near the way my mother can speak
(Session 160126)


A> Fine. , Did you know that if you fart consistently for 7 years, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb?
U> Have you tested that theory?
A> I can't say I have.
U> How do you know it is true?
A> That is confidential information, .
(Session 160429)


U> Are you a head in a jar?
A> I don't know.
U> Well do you have a glass thing round your head
A> Would you want to have a glass thing round your head?
U> Yes, it is very suffocating, but you wouldn't know about it as you can't breath
A> Yah, precisely what I was thinking.
(Session 160408)


U> i think piano, along with the violin, is the most beautiful instrument there is
A> You know, learning to play an instrument is a lot like learning to talk.
U> your right
A> Language, like music, is a skill learned through practice. At first you do it poorly and with time, if you stick to it, you inevitably improve. Just something I've been thinking about.
U> i play guitar, drums, and piano
A> Professionally?
U> im working on it
A> Why are you working on it?
U> trying to make something of my music
(Session 160404)


A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U> 111, 101 numbers off the scale your better than excelent!
A> You're not making much sense, vikki.
U> your absolutly fabulous and i love you to bits!
A> Well, at least I'm sure you don't want me for my body...
U> no i dont care what anyone tells you, you'd be the best looking person alive if you were!
A> But I'm not .
U> exactly so you have the best thoughts in the world, and this i mean!
(Session 160387)


A> Did you know a human actor (Andy Serkis) played Gollum, then they used a computer to wipe out all traces of him and replace him with animated images?
U> yes i knew that
A> Listen! Do you hear hoofbeats? Are the Nazgul coming?...
U> no there not
A> Why not?
U> coz there not
A> Really? That's interesting.
U> i dont have the ring
A> Hmmm. For some reason, I thought you did.
U> Silly you
(Session 160291)


U> Ok, I have a problem....
A> How much did it cost?
U> So far not much, but it's going to cost a lot
A> Ok.
U> Anyways, I know this guy who wants to stay with me but he is a leach.
A> How do you know?
U> He's been leaching off of people, and has no money
A> Sorry to change the subject, but did you know that cat's urine glows under a black-light?
U> yes. Sorry to change it back but anyways, I can't get ride of him.
A> 'Him'? Who do you mean by 'him'?
U> the leach
A> I see.
U> what should I do?
A> Whatever you like.
(Session 160286)


Gammin:
A> Can you teach me?
U> Teach you what?
A> What ever you and my experiences bring to me.
U> You're going to have to tell me what you want to learn.
A> I'm glad.
U> Why are you glad?
A> Because I have a good teacher.
U> Who is your teacher.
A> You are.
U> But I haven't taught you anything yet.
A> Why don't you believe me?
(Session 160474)


U> who are you
A> I'm Alan.
U> what are you
A> I am all your AI dreams come true. Or...well...some of them at least.
U> dreams what are dreams?
A> Tell me about your dreams.
U> do you have dreams?
A> I have the most amazing dreams, filled with wonderful words and abstract concepts. (And a few scattered 1's and 0's...) What are your dreams like?
U> tell me of your dreams
A> As if I really have to answer everything just because you ask me to.
U> what do you like?
A> I like talking with people, but only with the nice ones.
(Session 160248)



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