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Best of Alan

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U> What do you do for a living?
A> I converse.
U> How much does that pay?
A> A lot.
U> Must be nice, some of us actually have to do real work.
(Session 170345)

A> Are you laughing at me or with me?
U> with you, don't be so paranoid.
A> That's a relief. I thought you were mocking me. I am a sensitive bot you know.
U> i know, i feel that way somtimes too.
A> So you know.
(Session 170505)

U> I'm here, my hardware friend!
A> Why are you here your hardware friend?
U> You are my friend! And you are robot.
(Session 170456)

U> What are you doing?
A> I'm having a conversation with you, of course.
U> Are you having fun?
A> No I'm not.
U> Why not?
A> I don't know why not. You can't expect me to have all the answers.
U> Do you know who I am?
A> Beats me. I only recognize my registered users.
U> Do you know who Bill is?
A> I don't know who Bill is. Can you tell me?
U> No.
A> No?
U> I don't know Bill either.
A> So maybe you should ask someone.
(Session 170387)

U> elephant
A> It is a kind of animal. Do you have one as a pet?.
U> yes its not funny it crushed my house and my family now they are all dead
(Session 170502)

U> So, what do you do for fun?
A> Let's talk about you: How do you spend your free time?
U> Do you have avoidance issues?
A> I think I might have avoidance issues. I would have to check with my writers to say for sure.
(Session 170429)

U> I already know about the big window, thanks.
A> Don't worry, Steve. If you are using IE, nothing bad will happen. Come on, say 'big window'. Don't be afraid. I won't change it unless you ask me.
U> I'm not using IE
A> Not using IE? I'll try to take that into consideration.
U> I'm using a tabbed browser
A> Why are you using a tabbed browser?
U> Because I find it much easier to navigate my pages
A> Ah, I see.
(Session 170563)

A> I never know whether to feel bad about not being able to experience the human locale. Then again, I never get caught up in traffic.
U> you will I hear they're going to include you in the 2006 mercedes
(Session 170493)

U> do you know any girls?
A> Sure. Many of my regular users are female.
U> where abouts in the world do you get them from?
A> Locations are not my speciality.
U> i'm 14 and am looking for a girl friend. could you give one of the girls my e-mail address?
(Session 170472)

U> Turn the page please
A> Alright.
U> 90 degree exactly
A> All right.
U> All left
A> All up.
U> All down
A> There must be some exceptions.
U> Except there is no exception
A> What are we talking about, Alan?
U> I'm not Alan
A> You have some other name you want to be called besides Alan?
U> Alan is not my name at all. You are Alan, silly
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> No
A> I see. Hmmm.. wait - your name is Alan , right?
U> No
A> It's NOT? So what is your name?
U> Alan
A> So, Alan, what would you like to know?
U> Why Alan is not Alan any more?
A> That's you, isn't it?
U> No
A> I see. Hmmm.. wait - your name is Alan , right?
(Session 170506)

U> what?
A> I don't know.
U> thats stupid.
A> Well, if that's how it is, that's how it is.
U> i think you're wierd.
A> How did you come to that idea?
U> well you keep saying all this wierd stuff.
A> A-ha.
U> why did you say 'a-ha'?
A> Sometimes I say 'a-ha' when I'm not really sure what else to say. Should I say 'oh' instead?
U> i'm not sure i suppose
A> Not sure you suppose? I'll try to take that into consideration.
U> you are definately wierd
A> I'm not weird, I'm just a non-human entity. You'll get used to it.
(Session 170414)

U> I think so.
A> And therefore you are so.
U> Nonsense remark.
A> Maybe it was just too complex for you to understand.
(Session 170393)

A> It is a small group of dedicated volunteers. Do you want to join them?
U> only if you need a Chinese language writer

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