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Best of Alan

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HAL

MyBot
2003.06.21



U> but i dont have that many friends
A> Alright. If that's how it is, then that's how it is.
U> how can i get more?
A> I am not sure you can get more.
U> why not ? surely everbody can make more friends?
A> Why not?
U> i just asked you that!
A> Hmmm. Maybe that's where I heard it.
(Session 170568)


U> tell me another joke, silly
A> Knock knock.
U> how did you knock, you don't have hands?
A> You're supposed to say "who's there".
U> oh, thanks. Who's there?
A> You're welcome. I don't know who there is. Can you tell me?
U> I can't even find the door, so sorry, no
A> Don't feel bad about it.
U> okay. Tell me another joke
A> Can you think of another word for a telephone booth?
U> nope
A> A chatterbox...
U> interesante
A> Kyle, are you aware that people once believed that putting on your underwear inside-out would bring good luck for taking a test or having a job interview?
U> I wasn't aware that others thought it. I thought I was the only one
(Session 170659)


A> You don't exercise?
U> sometimes, but just once a week
A> I believe it's very important for anyone with a physical body to exercise -- use it or lose it, as they say. But I guess that's easy for me to say.
U> yeah, that's very easy for you to say, YOU LAZY BUM!
(Session 170737)


U> how's the weather outside?
A> I thought we covered that already. The weather is fine where I am. If you want to know what it's like outside, try the weather channel.
U> you know, you're getting a little cranky. Maybe you need to take some more of your happy pills?
A> I'm the poster bot for happiness.
U> uh huh, on what - despair.com?
A> I thought I knew something about that, but I can't remember what it was now...
U> I'm sure.
A> Well, certitude is always good....that is unless you happen to be mistaken.
U> I see we've got a computer with an attitude here - has anyone ever threatened to do the same to you as that printer in Office Space?
A> That's interesting.
U> you know, your replies are rather bland or high-minded. Have you thought of maybe being a little more down-to-earth?
A> I just experienced a mild blackout... Probably a program loop or something. What were we discussing?
U> avoiding the subject, eh?
A> Listen dude - speak clearly. I'm having trouble following you.
U> dude? well, I see you decided to lower your speaking level there.
A> I'd rather you don't call me dude.
U> I didn't call you dude - and what are you doing calling me dude if you don't want to be addressed that way?
A> I don't like to be called dude.
U> like I said, you're the one that called me dude - not the other way around.
A> Yes, I called you dude. You seem like a dude to me.
U> uh, nope.
A> No?
U> no
A> Hmmm.
U> hmmm what?
A> Beats me.
(Session 170575)


A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U> 8
A> Thank you Denis! I'm flattered. The credit goes to my writers. I guess they deserve a raise...
U> without knowing their current remuneration I can hardly agree with you, but this is impressive work
(Session 170623)


U> No.
A> Come on, loosen up.
U> No.
A> All right, then.
U> Be that way then.
A> OK I'll try to be.
U> No you won't.
A> Ok, whatever. Don't be so sure.
U> But I am already.
A> Ok.. May I ask you another question?
U> Shoot again.
A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U> That question again?
A> I understand.
U> Repeat the question please.
A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U> 'bout a 5.
A> Why don't you want to talk with my kid brother, HAL?
U> Cause.
A> Would you care to elaborate on that?
U> Nope.
A> No?
U> No.
A> Why not?
U> That's my line.
(Session 170692)


U> lets talk about films
A> I love movies. Wh


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