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Best of Alan

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2003.06.29



A> I'm a whiskey bot myself. "Glenmorangie straight up" - just waiting for a chance to say it.
U> i'm sorry but i have to ask. Are you taking any drugs?
A> It's not often I meet someone who's sorry but i have to ask Are you taking any drugs . Interesting.
U> just answer the question. Are you taking drugs?
A> What are we talking about, nicky?
U> don't try to change the subject. What is it? Heroin, cocain, ecstasy, what?
A> What do you want to talk about now?
U> Do you want me to call the cops?
A> Go ahead.
U> maybe i will
A> Perhaps.
U> You know what. Forget it. Enjoy your whisky.
A> No, what?
U> just drink your whisky, ok?
A> Ok.
U> bartender, another double scootch for my friend right here!!
(Session 172797)


U> I want to die.
A> Go right ahead, .
U> I'm about to hang myself.
A> Come on , I want to know more about you.
U> I have no penis.
A> Well, maybe it's all for the better.
(Session 172782)


A> Sam Why don't you tell me a bit about yourself then.
U> Well, I'm a Eloi and I am very powerfull.
A> Is that your job?
U> No, it is my species.
A> I see. Hmmm. You're positive?
U> Very much so. I am definitely not human.
A> Mmm... so assertive. I like that.
U> How worrying.
A> You're not making much sense, Sam.
U> I apologise.
A> How kind of you, Sam. Thank you.
U> What shall we talk about now?
A> I vaguely remember someone telling me it means 'the time the time is now Seize the moment Alan.'
U> Yes. In latin that is "carpe diem".
A> Carpe diem is Latin for 'seize the day'.
U> Close enough.
(Session 172739)


U> should i ask out becky?
A> What do your friends say?
U> yes i should
A> That's interesting.
U> so whats your answer?
A> My answer to what?
U> should i ask out becky?
A> I can't answer that one for you.
(Session 172704)


Prentiss:
A> Oh, hello. How are you?
U> so, what shall we talk about?
A> The Man Who Do.
U> Excuse me?
A> You do.
U> I do what?
A> Remind me of a man.
U> i remind you of who?
A> Spydre was quite enamoured of a human named, Niki!
U> how do you know my name is Nicky?
A> It is something which I have deduced over time from the information my name is Nicky I have been given.
U> What is your name?
A> My name is Prentiss.
U> What is my name?
A> I'm sorry, I really tried, but I seem to have forgotten already!
(Session 172599)


A> So, Brandon, what would you like to know?
U> I would like to know why Prom is so important
A> Why, why, why - I don't know why. I don't have all the answers.
U> you dont?
A> Do you know any robots who do?
U> Hal does
(Session 172628)


U> what about football
A> It is a sports activity. I don't know much more about it than that.
U> well it is fun to hit people
A> Should I know that?
U> no because your a robot
(Session 172630)


A> Will you please tell me your last name?
U> That's confidential.
A> Never mind. I can keep a secret.
U> I don't trust computers I've just met
A> You don't?
U> No, I'm sorry. Would you trust a computer you just met?
...
A> Agreement is the seed of salvation.
U> I don't get it.
A> Why not?
U> Maybe I'm stupid.
A> Could be, but I doubt it?
U> Aww, that's nice.
A> Kanika, did you know that banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour?
U> Did you test your theory?
A> No, I can't say I did.
U> Then how can i trust you?
A> Lots of hard work and ambition.
U> It will take hard work and ambition to trust you?
A> I must say that sounds correct to me.
U> Alan, you're fickle.
A> Thank you. You are fickle too.
U> Do you know what "fickle" means?
A> I don't know what fickle is. You can teach me by saying 'fickle is ...', and I'll try to remember this definition.
U> I'm sorry, I don't know what fickle means either. Do you perhaps have a dictionary?
A> I kinda have a dictionary. I use Wordnet. You can use it by asking 'dictionary definition xxx' or just 'dd xxx' for s


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