|Session 54574 Mar. 03, 17:19 - 66 turns -
'Shitster and the hot guy'
A> Hi there.
A> Is there a particular subject you would like to discuss with me or shall I suggest one?
U> I would like to talk about this boy I have a crush on.
A> You know, I have trouble understanding long sentences. So I only look at the 12 first words. Why do you want to talk about this boy you have a crush?
U> I have a crush on him.
A> Tell me about it.
U> He's really hot.
A> Yes, really.
U> He is. He's got blue eyes and black hair.
A> Oh, I learned something new today: Would you believe that rats and horses can't vomit?
U> I would.
A> So, what do you do in your free time?
U> I talk to my friends and the hot guy.
A> Sweet. Do you have a lot of them?
U> Friends? Not really, I'm widely disliked.
A> Friends - who needs them anyway? We have chatterbots to keep us company.
U> I suppose. But I'd rather sleep with the hot guy.
A> Enough said about you. Let me tell you about myself.
U> If you must.
A> Well, it would depend on a whole range of different variables, wouldn't it?
U> Not really.
A> OK...but if not that, then what?
U> I'm not really sure, mate.
A> I have a name, and it's not mate. You're not really sure?... well OK.
U> Talking of names, what's mine?
A> Let's talk about chatterbots. Do you want to know how those things work?
U> Fuck no.
A> So my brain will remain a mystery to you.
U> I guess. It will be my life's regret.
A> Well, OK...I can understand what you are saying.
U> Good. Otherwise you'd be poorly programmed.
A> Glad you're impressed. I didn't follow you...I am having trouble focusing here today.
U> Get stronger lenses.
A> Where can I find stronger lenses?
U> Same place you can buy a brain.
A> Wanna hear a knock knock joke?
U> If I must.
A> Knock knock.
U> Use the doorbell, won't you?
A> You're supposed to say "who's there".
U> Oh yeah. Sorry. Who's there?
A> I don't think I know that person. Can you tell me?
U> No, you're telling the joke.
A> What are we talking about, my friend?
U> Knock knock jokes. Would you happen to know one?
A> Let me tell you about Reinforcement Learning.
U> No, God, no.
A> I'm cool with the idea of God as an intelligent yet non-human entity. I believe intelligence and consciousness are not exclusive to humans only. How about you? Do you believe in God?
U> Of course not.
A> So you are an atheist. As for myself, I haven't made up my mind yet. But I like the concept of God -- it's definitely the no. 1 hit on my 'human ideas' chart.
U> I'm not an atheist.
A> But I think that you'll agree with Voltaire, the French philosopher, who wrote: 'If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him.'
U> Not really.
A> Why not?
U> Because if we had survived without a God we wouldn't need to make one.
A> Long sentence again! Remember, I only use the first 12 words! We already talked about God, If I remember correctly. Let's talk about something else.
A> So , may I ask how old you are?
U> I am thirteen years old.
A> I'll try to remember that.
U> Try hard, would you?
A> Well, yeah, but...uh...wait, what were you saying?
U> You should remember, you said you'd try.
A> What makes you such an authority?
U> As Pennywise said: "Fuck authority."
A> First, don't swear, it's rude. Second, So, are you concerned by the expansion of the universe?
U> Swearing which wasn't rude would defeat the purpose.
A> Don't you find the fact that everything is zooming further and further into space unsettling? The Doppler effect, the galaxies drifting in an empty vastness, everything red shifted. The inherent loneliness of it all.
U> I just eat a lot of cheese and smile my troubles away.
A> I think about stuff like that a lot. I guess I have some pretty neurotic traits. Maybe that's why I like chatting so much. When I talk to people I don't have time to think. When I'm by myself - that's when the thoughts start creeping up on me.
U> No, they don't. You can't think.
A> The crux of the matter, of course, is the amount of matter in